Samuel is just over three weeks old, and he has had a few successful outings. He's asleep on his daddy's chest right now, and they are both snoring softly. He has hit a growth spurt and is probably ready to move past three ounces; in fact, he was hungry every two and a half hours today. I had to take him to work today to wrap up the school year (This was our last workday), and he made the first couple of hours fun with five blowouts. Morris Johnson, my good friend whose son was born five days before Samuel, brought little Rob with him today, and our boys should be great friends.
Summer break is here!
Friday, May 25, 2012
Saturday, May 12, 2012
One Week at Home
We've been home for a week now, and life is good. Grammy runs the house, Poppy loves on the baby when we're working, and the parents are living off fumes and joy. The routine is down, and we're all starting to recognize which cry is which.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
The Name
Samuel means "God heard," "requested of God," "God's heart," or "God's name." Could this name be more suited to this child? fitting?
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Coming Home!
The Kratzers stayed at the Burgins' house last night and then headed to Greensboro around noon today. The trip was uneventful, and Samuel slept all the way. Four of our neighbors stopped by to coo and hug us, and Cindy Holt brought a delicious meal. (The bar has been set!) Samuel slept most of day; in fact, he napped through two feedings. I was thankful because his exhaustion helped me get some much-needed rest.
Our air conditioner isn't working, and Stan spent the day running around trying to figure out how to get the house cooled off. It's almost 11 PM, and the house is pretty comfortable. Tomorrow's bottles are washed, Stan has crashed, Samuel is asleep in Grammy's arms, and Poppy is headed up to bed. I'm going to change a diaper and lie down beside my son's bassinet and thank God for the most beautiful exhaustion I've ever felt.
Our air conditioner isn't working, and Stan spent the day running around trying to figure out how to get the house cooled off. It's almost 11 PM, and the house is pretty comfortable. Tomorrow's bottles are washed, Stan has crashed, Samuel is asleep in Grammy's arms, and Poppy is headed up to bed. I'm going to change a diaper and lie down beside my son's bassinet and thank God for the most beautiful exhaustion I've ever felt.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Samuel Myles!
Friday, May 4 Samuel left the hospital after his birth parents signed the proper paperwork! At the writing of this post, he is asleep in Angie's arms.
Thursday, May 3 Everyone involved with the adoption struggled through this day. It's 10:00 PM, and we've been up since 4:30 AM. We got a hotel room near the hospital so that we could go over to the hospital for the feedings and nap when possible. Sleep is hard to come by because the birth parents are grieving and hurting. Emotions are running high, and all four of us have melted down at some point today. My favorite moment of the day was at the end of the 8:00 PM feeding: I carried the baby over to Stan and asked Samuel, "Do you want a goodnight kiss from Daddy?" His eyes popped open, and he kept them open for about three minutes, the longest stretch we've seen.
Wednesday, May 2
Tuesday, May 1 We had dinner with both parents and their daughter, who is the baby's full sister. We stared at her the whole time, wondering how much her brother would look like her. Angie was waiting in the restaurant lobby for them, and when the hostess opened the door, the birth father opened arms for a hug and said, "Hey, Mama." We took lots of pictures and got a cute video of the family. We learned that the surgery was moved to 11:30 and that Angie will be wearing one of the two wrist bands given to parents for access to the nursery.
Monday, April 30 Our big dog Spencer is utterly freaked out by all the commotion. He knew something was up. Rudy, as usual, was clueless. Angie, totally overwhelmed by it all, threw up all day.
Sunday, April 29 The nursery is set up and ready for a little boy!
Saturday, April 28 Angie's college roommate and forever-friend Donna Cunningham brought a car full of little boy clothes to the house. She taught Angie how to swaddle a baby with receiving blankets. So sweet!
Friday, April 27 We got our lawyer involved in dealing with the hospital's policy that no infant can leave the hospital with anyone but the birth mother. Since our birth mother is choosing not to see her son, that rule just might now work. Our birth mother texted Angie that her husband wanted to meet us, and we worked out a time to meet Tuesday night.
Thursday, April 26 We had a conference call with a SC adoption attorney, and he immediately jumped in. He got one of his adoption counselors on the call, and before we were home from work, that counselor had spoken with the birth mother and made an appointment to see her for some initial paperwork. We were surprised to learn that, in SC, a biracial child falls under the "special needs" category for placement. This child's biological mother is Caucasian, and his father has an African-American parent and a Puerto Rican parent.
Wednesday, April 25 Carolina Adoption Services recommended Brinton Wright, an adoption lawyer in Greensboro, and Angie spoke with him at length about all the options. After several phone calls, we decided that it would be best to hire a South Carolina adoption lawyer to handle matters since the birth family resides there (even though the baby was to be born in NC). Brinton Wright gave away a client, and we were so very impressed by his selflessness. The most appealing element of hiring a SC lawyer is that state's lack of a revocation period. Once the birth parents have signed the paperwork abdicating their rights as parents, there is no turning back for them. After our October 2011 reversal, we found that piece appealing.
Tuesday, April 24 Stan spoke at length with a lawyer who could answer few of his questions. She sent us a contract, but we both felt restless and unsettled about working with her.
Friday, April 20 We drove to a small town in North Carolina to meet the birth mother and her sister (because her husband had to work). We hit it off instantly and talked non-stop for an hour and a half. Just before we left, the mother said, "I know you two want to be at the hospital that day." We assured her that we did but that she called the shots about our presence that day. What came next was a shock: She invited Angie to be in the operating room with her and made it clear that she wanted the baby to be handed over to Angie.
Wednesday, April 18 Our international home study for our Uganda adoption was finalized by Carolina Adoption Services in Greensboro (great people!).
Tuesday, April 17 The birth mother called Angie's friend early in the morning and said she wanted to meet us. Tena called Stan at home, Stan called Angie at work, Angie called Tena on her cell, and we spoke for the first time in 25 years. Angie got the mother's contact information, texted her, and set a phone date for that evening. The two women spoke Tuesday evening, "clicked" on the phone, and Angie learned that she was due May 14 but was scheduled for a C-section May 2. We agreed to meet for dinner on Friday.
Monday, April 16 One of Angie's high school friends, an ultrasound tech, met a young married woman who opened up about her desire to go the adoption route for her child. The friend, Tena Pate Simmons, told her about us.
Thursday, May 3 Everyone involved with the adoption struggled through this day. It's 10:00 PM, and we've been up since 4:30 AM. We got a hotel room near the hospital so that we could go over to the hospital for the feedings and nap when possible. Sleep is hard to come by because the birth parents are grieving and hurting. Emotions are running high, and all four of us have melted down at some point today. My favorite moment of the day was at the end of the 8:00 PM feeding: I carried the baby over to Stan and asked Samuel, "Do you want a goodnight kiss from Daddy?" His eyes popped open, and he kept them open for about three minutes, the longest stretch we've seen.
Wednesday, May 2
- We got to the hospital at 9:45 AM to meet our birth parents in the lobby. They were late because the adoption counselor was late getting to their house to have them sign an affidavit giving the hospital permission to give Angie one of the nursery wrist bands.
- While the staff was getting the birth mother prepped for surgery, Angie and Stan met the extended birth family--grandmother and aunt, who hugged us tearfully and sat with us waiting for Angie to be called back for the surgery.
- Angie's parents arrived at 11:00 to wait with Stan, met the grandmother and aunt, and spent the next seven hours with the family. It was awkward and emotional---joy on one side of the room and grief on the other. (It just hit me that this even was, indeed, life itself. The beautiful, God-orchestrated blessing in this is that the families grieved and celebrated WITH each other. When Angie's parents were leaving, the two grandmothers held each other and cried.)
- Angie was taken back to the holding room around 11:45 to put on a "bunny suit" and wait with the birth parents. When she walked in, the birth mother was in LABOR. (Keep in mind: this was supposed to be a pre-term C-section.). Although this was her third child, she had never experienced labor before; the first two were also pre-term C-sections. Her husband and Angie sat watching the monitor and giving commentary on the spikes ("Yeah, that was definitely a contraction.") Anyone watching would have found the whole scene pretty funny since I'm sure the birth mother didn't need anyone giving a play by play when her contractions were two minutes apart.)
- At about 12:30 everybody was prepped and ready to go in the operating room. While Angie, Stan, and the birth father waited outside the door, the birth mother was given an epidural and a stool was rolled beside her. Angie was brought in, and when the birth mother saw her, she said, "Oh, I'm so glad you're in here. I feel so much better now." Angie stroked her head and held her hand behind the screen while the OB and the OR staff worked on the C-section.
- At 12:49 we heard a cry and Angie started crying. The birth mother looked over and asked if she was ok!
- Angie was taken to the warmer to get pics and hold him for the first time.
- The nurse walked out of the delivery room and showed the baby to "the fathers." When she asked Stan if he wanted to hold the baby, he gasped. Angie actually got a picture of that moment.
- The rest of the day was a blur of nursery visits, feedings, and emotion. The sweetest moment was when Angie sneaked back to the nursery to ask if she could hold the baby, and the staff got her set up in a glider in front of the nursery window and called the waiting room. Both families came to this little window and packed their faces in to look and take pictures.
- Did I mention that our son was born about five minutes from the house I grew up in?
Tuesday, May 1 We had dinner with both parents and their daughter, who is the baby's full sister. We stared at her the whole time, wondering how much her brother would look like her. Angie was waiting in the restaurant lobby for them, and when the hostess opened the door, the birth father opened arms for a hug and said, "Hey, Mama." We took lots of pictures and got a cute video of the family. We learned that the surgery was moved to 11:30 and that Angie will be wearing one of the two wrist bands given to parents for access to the nursery.
Monday, April 30 Our big dog Spencer is utterly freaked out by all the commotion. He knew something was up. Rudy, as usual, was clueless. Angie, totally overwhelmed by it all, threw up all day.
Sunday, April 29 The nursery is set up and ready for a little boy!
Saturday, April 28 Angie's college roommate and forever-friend Donna Cunningham brought a car full of little boy clothes to the house. She taught Angie how to swaddle a baby with receiving blankets. So sweet!
Friday, April 27 We got our lawyer involved in dealing with the hospital's policy that no infant can leave the hospital with anyone but the birth mother. Since our birth mother is choosing not to see her son, that rule just might now work. Our birth mother texted Angie that her husband wanted to meet us, and we worked out a time to meet Tuesday night.
Thursday, April 26 We had a conference call with a SC adoption attorney, and he immediately jumped in. He got one of his adoption counselors on the call, and before we were home from work, that counselor had spoken with the birth mother and made an appointment to see her for some initial paperwork. We were surprised to learn that, in SC, a biracial child falls under the "special needs" category for placement. This child's biological mother is Caucasian, and his father has an African-American parent and a Puerto Rican parent.
Wednesday, April 25 Carolina Adoption Services recommended Brinton Wright, an adoption lawyer in Greensboro, and Angie spoke with him at length about all the options. After several phone calls, we decided that it would be best to hire a South Carolina adoption lawyer to handle matters since the birth family resides there (even though the baby was to be born in NC). Brinton Wright gave away a client, and we were so very impressed by his selflessness. The most appealing element of hiring a SC lawyer is that state's lack of a revocation period. Once the birth parents have signed the paperwork abdicating their rights as parents, there is no turning back for them. After our October 2011 reversal, we found that piece appealing.
Tuesday, April 24 Stan spoke at length with a lawyer who could answer few of his questions. She sent us a contract, but we both felt restless and unsettled about working with her.
Friday, April 20 We drove to a small town in North Carolina to meet the birth mother and her sister (because her husband had to work). We hit it off instantly and talked non-stop for an hour and a half. Just before we left, the mother said, "I know you two want to be at the hospital that day." We assured her that we did but that she called the shots about our presence that day. What came next was a shock: She invited Angie to be in the operating room with her and made it clear that she wanted the baby to be handed over to Angie.
Wednesday, April 18 Our international home study for our Uganda adoption was finalized by Carolina Adoption Services in Greensboro (great people!).
Tuesday, April 17 The birth mother called Angie's friend early in the morning and said she wanted to meet us. Tena called Stan at home, Stan called Angie at work, Angie called Tena on her cell, and we spoke for the first time in 25 years. Angie got the mother's contact information, texted her, and set a phone date for that evening. The two women spoke Tuesday evening, "clicked" on the phone, and Angie learned that she was due May 14 but was scheduled for a C-section May 2. We agreed to meet for dinner on Friday.
Monday, April 16 One of Angie's high school friends, an ultrasound tech, met a young married woman who opened up about her desire to go the adoption route for her child. The friend, Tena Pate Simmons, told her about us.
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